Clouds On My Shoulders
by dance-sing-live
Summary: Kurt wakes up one day unable to see. How will this affect his life? How will it affect his relationships with his dad, Blaine and his friends? A day-to-day glimpse into Kurt's new way of life.
1. Chapter 1

_**AN: Hi everyone! So first off, I would like to start by saying that this story is based off of the fic **_**Blind ****_by would-you-like-a-jellybaby. The original plotline is theirs, and I am simply expanding upon the idea. _**

**_Second, I get all my facts off the internet so please excuse any inaccuracies. _**

**_Third, this is the first fanfic I have written in a _****_looooong time. However, I do promise that I will give this one an actual end, unlike my other story. (I may go back to that story later, maybe during the summer.) That's all! Thank you, and please please review!_**

* * *

**Prologue: Blurring**

"C'mon Kurt, it's getting late and the movie's just about done. Let's head to bed," Burt said.

"Dad! It's barely 11:30! Besides, I'm waiting for Blaine to text me back."

"Kurt. We have an early morning tomorrow. I have a customer coming in at 7 with their car. They need their tires and oil done. If we both help, then we can get it done fast. I know you care about Blaine, and I know you miss him, but it can wait. Go to bed. He'll be back in two days," Burt reprimanded his son. Kurt sighed and turned to go downstairs.

"Fine. Oh, and Dad?"

"Yeah son?"

"Speaking of seeing Blaine, well… I'm not exactly sure what's up, but I've been getting a little bit of tunnel vision lately, as well as a headache. It just started like, yesterday though," Kurt said nervously. "What do you think is up with that?"

"Honestly, Kurt I'm not sure. I'll call your opterminst tomorrow morning. Remind me, it might be important."

"Okay Dad. Love you , goodnight." Burt said the same thing back to Kurt, and Kurt turned down the stairs to his bedroom, which was in the basement. All of a sudden, he stopped. His vision blurred, and he blinked a few times to clear it. Ignoring the sinking feeling in his stomach, he went downstairs and got ready for bed.

* * *

Kurt reached his hand out and turned his alarm off. He sat up and rubbed his eyes. He grimaced, wondering why he had a headache at 6 in the morning. Oh, that reminds me. Better tell dad to make an appointment with my eye doctor. This isn't normal… Kurt stood up, changed his clothes and went upstairs. He could already smell the breakfast his dad was making, and started to run up the stairs. He still didn't trust Burt with cooking, even after all this time.

"Mornin' kiddo," Burt said by way of greeting. "Hey am I doing this right?" He fiddled with the oven and attempted to flip the pancakes over in the pan.

Kurt sighed. "No dad, that's not how you do it." Kurt took the pan from his dad and motioned for him to make coffee. "Dad, did you make the appointment for my eyes?" Burt looked up.

"Yeah. The earliest they can see you is next week. Is that okay or do you need an earlier appointment?"

Kurt thought for a minute. _No need to worry him. Dad has enough on his plate already._ "Yeah Dad, that's fine. Thanks. I can't wait for Blaine to come home tomorrow," he said, deliberately changing the subject. "Come on, let's head on over to the garage. We can get a head start on some stuff." Burt nodded and cleaned up the plates.

* * *

On the drive home from the garage, Kurt was texting Blaine.

**B: Can't wait to see my boyfriend and best friend after two weeks ;)**

**K: Me too. I'm counting down the days.**

**B: Well, better start counting the hours. I'm at the airport. Gotta go now babe. I'll see you in 10 hours. Ilysm.**

**K: Love you. :***

Burt looked over at his smiling son. What he wouldn't give to see that face more. Burt knew that Kurt was having a tough time at school, and he intended to have a talk with him about it as the school year approached. Burt wasn't going to have his son have a miserable junior year of high school. Kurt looked up as they pulled into the driveway, and saw his dad staring at him. Burt quickly averted his eyes and cleared his throat.

"Alrighty. Let's go on in. Want to watch Deadliest Catch tonight?" Burt asked, knowing full well the answer.

"Dad. I don't have time for TV unless it's America's Next Top Model, Desperate Housewives, Say Yes To The Dress, So You Think You Can Dance, X Factor, American Idol, Project: Runway or My Fair Wedding. So thanks, but no thanks." Kurt said back, in a teasing tone of voice. Burt chuckled, deciding not to point out that his son just listed a bunch of TV shows, even though he claimed he had 'no time.' "As a matter of fact, I think I'm going to head to my room. My head's been aching all day, and working in a noisy garage all day didn't really help."

"Sorry kiddo, but helping in the garage is part of the deal. I'll see you tomorrow," Burt called over his shoulder. "Feel better."

Kurt smiled. He had such a kind dad. Kurt loved him so much, even though he didn't tell him everything about his life - like the slushies, the locker checks, Karofsky… Kurt shook his head. He wasn't going to let those thoughts ruin his mood. As far as Kurt knew, he had a very sexy boyfriend returning from the Bahamas in the morning, and he wanted to look his best for him.

**_TBC. I have the first couple chapters prewritten, so I'm hoping to get them up soon, as long as people review! Things will get more dramatic next chapter!_**

**_DC: I do not own any characters you recognize. _**


	2. Chapter 2: Gone

_**There, told you things would pick up in this chapter! Sorry if this seems a little choppy... It's just how I envisioned someone feeling after something like this happens. I'm posting this earlier than planned to celebrate Christmas break for me! Also, I know that a lot of people had finals this week... And some (like me) have some after break! So good luck to everyone who's taking them and still has to take them! Please forgive any inaccuracies.**_

* * *

**Chapter One - Gone**

Kurt's phone alarm rang, Applause by Lady Gaga ringing into his ears. Kurt rolled over and tried to ignore it, but then he remembered why it was ringing. Blaine was back today! Kurt slammed his hand onto his phone excitedly, silencing the song. Kurt sat up and rubbed his temples. It was perfect - Blaine was back, his headache was gone, and they had the whole day to themselves because Burt was working. Kurt jumped out of bed and started to make his way to his vanity before he realized what was wrong. He stopped in his tracks.

What was wrong

What was wrong

What was wrong with him?

No. What was wrong with the world.

What was wrong with the sun

What was wrong with his phone screen

What was wrong with his mirror

Why was the sun the only source of light

Why was there no reflection gazing back at him

What was wrong with the labels on his moisturizers

What was wrong

What was wrong

WHAT WAS WRONG.

Kurt collapsed onto the floor, burying his face into his knees, huddled into a ball. There was nothing wrong with him. He just got up too quickly, his head and eyes would adjust in a minute. Kurt cautiously lifted his head up again, and opened his eyes.

Nothing.

What was wrong

Kurt took a deep breath and squeezed his eyes together. His stomach was churning, but not from hunger like it was before.

Fear.

Isolation

Darkness

Darkness

Darkness everywhere

Darkness capturing him

Darkness enveloping him in its cold, sinister fingers

Darkness everywhere Kurt looked.

With a strangled cry, Kurt ran. Where was he running? Up the stairs? Out the window? Kurt didn't know. He was blind to the world, both literally and figuratively.

Something hard

Something soft

Something warm

Kurt collided into a tall object, and he let out a surprised "oof!" as the foreign object inquired "Kurt? Kurt, buddy? What's up?" When there was no reply, the… the thing lifted Kurt off the ground and helped him over to a sofa.

"Kurt." It was gentle, soft, familiar. But why? In his hysteria, Kurt couldn't think. He couldn't remember why he was there. Where he was. Who he was.

"Kurt." There it was again. That sound. That sound… Right. That sound was his name. All Kurt could say in response was a quiet moan.

"Kurt. Kurt, honey, it's your dad. What's wrong?" Burt was looking at his son, eyes covered with his hands, his head buried in the crook of Burt's neck. I swear, if this is a nightmare about that school of his, I'm going to burn it. "Kurt, what's wrong? Does your head hurt? What hurts?" That time Burt was rewarded with an answer.

"Everything. Everything's wrong."

How those three words uttered by his only son could break his heart as easily as they did, Burt would never know. What he did know though, was that he had to get to the bottom of why Kurt was acting like this. "Kurt? Can you open your eyes?"

Kurt lifted his head up, hands still covering his eyes. Eyes. What were those? Why were his closed? Kurt slowly dropped his hands, and tried to open his eyes.

Eyes. Eyes open. Open. Why were they closed? Eyes are supposed to be open. With his stomach sinking, Kurt pushed his eyelids open. As he did, he was trying - but failing - to think encouraging things to himself. Open. Almost there. See. That wasn't so bad. Why were they even closed? Kurt looked up. Oh. That's why they were closed. With the realization hitting him, his jaw dropped and an agonizing sob ripped out of his throat.

"Kurt. Kurt! Kurt, honey listen to m, your dad!" Burt was shaking his son, trying to snap him out of the trance he was in. "Kurt! What's wrong? What's scaring you? Focus. Where are you right now?"

In his mind, Kurt knew he was sitting in the living room. Flatscreen TV across the room from them, pictures on top of the piano to the left of them, iPod speakers on top of the fireplace. He was nuzzled in his dad's protective arms, lying on the white couch.

"Kurt. Calm down hon. Just tell me what you see."

That was the problem. Kurt knew where he was.

But he didn't know what he saw.

Because all he saw was darkness.

_**TBC.**_

_**DC: I am but a freshman in high school, so alas I do not own.**_


	3. Chapter 3: Knowing

_**AN: I know, I know, I suck! So sorry for not updating, tech week plus finals plus two shows plus auditions... Yeah.**_

_**ALSO! I messed up! This is the REAL Chapter 2.**_

* * *

**Chapter Two: Questioning**

Kurt barely knows what's going on, but what he does know is that he's surrounded by darkness, except for the bright glare of the early morning sun. Kurt squirmed on the bed. He wanted his dad. He didn't know where he was, what was wrong, what was happening… Where was his dad.

Not even thirty seconds later, Kurt heard footsteps. As he thought about it, they were really loud… Was that normal? _Oh well, just another thing for me to worry about._ Kurt lifted his head and looked at where he thought the door was. In a strained whisper, he said "Dad?"

There was a shaky sigh coming from the doorway. "Yeah buddy. It's Dad."

Kurt choked back a sob of relief. "Daddy… Daddy." The tears didn't stay back anymore, and even though Kurt tried to suppress them, they sprang forward. "Daddy," he sobbed. "I'm so scared. What's wrong with me? Fix it Daddy, please, fix _me_." Burt looked at his distraught son, lying helplessly on the hospital bed. He was frozen at first, not used to Kurt being so outward with his emotions. Then he snapped out of it and quickly walked over to the bed and scooped Kurt into his arms, so that his head was buried in his shoulder and his legs were draped over Burt's lap.

"Oh buddy… If only I could." Suddenly, Burt found himself crying alongside his son. _So much for being a strong support system… Oh gosh… This is all my fault. Why didn't I take him in earlier? This could have been prevented… I'm the worst man to ever be called a father._ Burt looked up suddenly as he realized Kurt was talking to him, frantically asking him questions. Questions that Burt didn't have the answer to. "A doctor will be in here soon. He'll help you out Kurt. Oh gosh, I love you so much Kurt. So so much. It'll be okay. You'll see," Burt said in response, cringing when he heard his choice of words. Then he realized that Kurt was talking again.

"Dad? If it's not too much trouble, could you maybe call Blaine? He needs to know about this."

Yes. Burt could call Blaine. He had already messed up so many times… Lord knows he could at least do that.

* * *

When Burt walked back into Kurt's room, he turned and saw a doctor walking in after him.

"Good morning Kurt, Mr. Hummel. How are you feeling this morning?" The doctor asked. Burt looked at him incredulously. That doctor was asking how he was feeling? Didn't he go to medical school, he should be helping them, not exchanging pleasantries! The doctor seemed to sense that that wasn't going anywhere, and cleared his throat. "Now, Kurt. My name is Dr. William Blanc. I know you're very nervous right now, and I know you're probably scared and confused. What I'm going to do right now is ask you and your father a few questions so that our team can make our final diagnosis before taking any permanent actions." Kurt nodded and Burt remained silent. "Alright. Let's get started. I know this is kinda sudden, but Kurt, can you tell me what you see?"

Kurt lifted his head again, and opened his eyes, to no avail. He stuttered "Um. Um well there's a light… I'm guessing sunlight…"

"Very good Kurt, where is the sunlight coming from, can you tell?"

"The far right corner of the room, I guess there's a window or something there."

"Alright, anything else?"

That was the question Kurt dreaded. "No." Might as well make it easy for himself and tell the simple truth.

"Okay, thanks Kurt. Now I'm going to adjust something very quickly, and I need you to tell me if it makes a difference. But first, can you tell me how you physically feel? Any headaches recently?"

Kurt nodded. "I had one yesterday, but it went away this morning and I'm fine now."

Dr. Blanc wrote something down and then stood up and walked away. A minute later he sat down again. "Okay Kurt, just let me know if any of that changes. Now, I have some more questions. I know it hurts to think about this, Kurt, but it's mandatory that we make the right diagnosis here. How has your vision been, prior to this morning?"

"It's been okay… Like I said, just headaches and sometimes my vision would blur."

Burt spoke up here. "We had made an appointment at his optometrist for all that. He was supposed to come in next week."

Dr. Blanc nodded. "Alright. I have a pretty clear idea of what this is. But just to make sure, does your family have any medical history we should know about? Was anyone hospitalised at any point? And Kurt, I'm guessing you wear glasses as well, so if you could tell us the prescription that would be great."

Kurt turned to Burt. Burt said "Well his mother had diabetes. She collapsed one day from low blood sugar, and the hospital found out she also had a tumor in her brain. It was deadly, and kept spreading. She passed away from that eight years ago." Dr, Blanc nodded, looking at them with sympathy. Burt continued. "I had a heart attack last year, and I'm on meds for high blood pressure. Kurt's been in perfect health ever since he was a baby, except that he's nearsighted," Dr. Blanc finished writing that down.

"Well Kurt, I think I know what you have. However, I'm just going to double check in case. I'll be back in about an hour, maybe sooner. Until then, you can have visitors, you can eat, whatever you wish to do." Kurt nodded and Burt thanked the doctor as he left the room.

Burt sat on the edge of Kurt's bed. "Blaine should be here any minute now. You can hang out with him all you want when he gets here." Kurt nodded and whispered his thanks.

"I think I'm going to sleep for a little bit Dad… I'm kind of drained. You should go grab something to eat. We have time before we have to be back up here." Burt started to protest, but looked at his son again. His seventeen year old son, lying in the hospital bed. The least Burt could do was do as he said. Burt nodded.

"Okay honey. I'll leave as soon as Blaine's here. Sleep for a little bit Kurt. Just rest." Kurt settled back on his pillows and closed his eyes. Within a few minutes, his breathing had evened out. Burt sat down on one of the chairs next to the bed. As he watched his son sleep, he felt his bottom lip tremble, and suddenly his eyes welled up with tears. He gazed at Kurt's peaceful, sleeping face. From this point of view, it looked like Kurt was just napping. But Burt knew that Kurt wasn't merely asleep. Kurt has suffered a life changing loss, and Burt just couldn't believe it. Burt looked at his son through tear-filled eyes, lying helplessly in the white bed. Before he knew it, his head was in his hands and he was sobbing.

_**TBC. Thanks for reading, this chapter made me sad. Please review! Love you all!**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**AN: Hello again, dear readers. This chapter made me really sad, so I apologize in advance. Forgive any inaccuracies, once again my only source is the internet!**_

_**One more thing - this chapter takes place during the first chapter of the original story,**_** Blind****_, by would-you-like-a-jellybaby. It would be very helpful (and even sadder) if you read that first, because that chapter always breaks my heart. That's also part of the reason why this is so short - because so much of what's going on here is found in that chapter._**

**_So, read the first chapter of_**** Blind****_, and then read this and enjoy!_**

* * *

**Chapter Three: Informing**

Blaine knocked on the door. Kurt, startled, sat up quickly even though he had just been sleeping the minute before. Burt looked up and nodded at Blaine. He left the room as Blaine entered.

"Blaine?" Kurt said quietly. Kurt was a little nervous, he didn't know how Blaine would react to this.

Blaine's breath caught in his throat. "Yes, baby. It's me." His voice caught in his throat as he looked at Kurt, sitting up in the bed, as he gazed into Kurt's glazed-over eyes.

"Blaine… Blaine I'm scared. I don't know what happened to me." Kurt stuttered. He felt tears in his eyes and tried not to let them fall. "Blaine, what if I never see again?"

"Baby, it doesn't matter. I will always love you, and we can get through this," Blaine said, standing awkwardly next to his boyfriend's bed.

"Can you move closer, Blaine? I… I can't tell where you are." Blaine nodded, but then remembered that his boyfriend couldn't see it. He sat next to Kurt, and held him in his arms.

"I'm sorry this happened to you, baby. You don't deserve it. I'm so sorry." Blaine pulled Kurt closer and whispered in his ear.

"It's not your fault Blaine… This would have happened eventually, I'm sure." Kurt sniffled, not able to hold his tears back. "I just wish it had never happened at all." He whispered that, but no sooner had Blaine hugged him, his eyes were overflowing. Blaine had also started to tear up, but hearing the love of his life crying, so despairingly made him break down. Within minutes, they were holding each other and sobbing into each other's shoulders. This was how it would be from now on - Kurt would never be able to see.

* * *

About fifteen minutes later, Burt entered the room with red-rimmed eyes. He had just talked to Kurt's doctor, and they were about to talk to Kurt about it. He rubbed his eyes, looked up and saw Blaine and Kurt cuddled in Kurt's bed, asleep. It had been obvious that they were both crying. As much as he hated to wake them up, he wanted Kurt to be alert when he received the news. He walked over to the bed and gently touched Kurt's shoulder. "Kurt," he said. "Kurt, the doctor's here. Wake up." Kurt sat up again and blinked sleepily before the realization hit him. Then, without moving his head, he reached down, feeling around the bed for Blaine. Blaine sat up and hugged Kurt again. Then Blaine got out of the bed, but kept holding Kurt's hand so that he knew he was there.

Just then, Dr. Blanc walked in holding Kurt's file and a clipboard. "Kurt? We have your results here, and if you're ready to hear it…" Burt looked down and turned away. Kurt swallowed and squeezed Blaine's hand.

"Please, let's just get it over with."

Dr. Blanc opened the file. "Well Kurt, there's no easy way to say this, but you have _acute angle-closure glaucoma._ This means that the pressure in your eye has been building up quickly, because the fluid in your eyes cannot drain out. Now, usually this happens in only one of the patient's eyes, but unfortunately, you have it in both eyes. What you have is a very rare case. Usually, AACG only occurs in adults over the age of forty. But we have reviewed your chart, as well as your parents' charts, and we've determined that this was partly hereditary - the nearsightedness, the high blood pressure, the diabetes. However, those were only factors of it. Anyone is at risk for glaucoma."

Kurt whispered "Okay," as he squeezed Blaine's hand and furrowed his brow. "But there's something you're not telling me."

Dr. Blanc took a deep breath. "Kurt, as you know, right now you can't see anything. That's because the AACG was left untreated for so long. Kurt, vision that is lost be glaucoma cannot, and never will be, able to be regained."

There was a sharp intake of breath from the others in the room. Kurt looked up, his face sorrowful. "What…"

"Kurt, I'm so sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you are permanently blind."

Permanently blind.

Permanently blind.

Vision that is lost can never be regained.

Permanent darkness.

_**TBC. This was sad, wasn't it? Anyways, I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas if you celebrate it, and I wish everyone a Happy New Year!**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**AN - sorry, a very short one today. I know these are short, but I like to think of them more as drabbles, if you will with little glimpses into Kurt's life. Hopefully they'll be longer in the future.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

**Chapter Four: Realizing**

Kurt had fallen into a deep sleep after he received the news. Blaine was wiping his eyes with tissues, and Burt was staring into space. After a couple hours, Burt looked at Blaine.

"You know Blaine, this is a life altering event. If you're planning to be here, you better be here for the long run. You can't just abandon Kurt. So if you want to leave, you better leave now."

Blaine looked at Burt, aghast. "Mr. Hummel, I would never, ever, ever do something like that. Kurt is the love of my life. But I can't believe something like this happened to him…" He trailed off. "But sir, you have to understand that I l_ove_ Kurt. I would never leave him." By the time he finished speaking, his eyes were filled with tears again and he reached for another tissue.

Burt nodded. "That's what I thought you would say. But kid, none of this 'sir' buisness. It's Burt. Especially now, since we'll probably be seeing a lot of each other from now on. But right now, it's late. You have to drive all the way to Westerville. Go home. I'll call you in the morning."

Blaine looked up and started to protest. Burt held his hand up and silenced him. Blaine looked at him and stood up. "I'll see you tomorrow Mr… Burt. Call me at anytime if you need anything." He walked over to Kurt's bed and kissed his forehead. Kurt stirred but didn't wake up. Blaine left the room and walked out to his car.

* * *

Kurt woke up and called for his dad weakly. Burt walked over to the bed and patted Kurt's shoulder. "Kurt, the doctor came in earlier. He said that you will have your first session with your CVRS today at 11 am. It's 10 am now."

"My what?" Kurt asked.

Burt shrugged. "It's so that you can get a head start on everything new, I guess. I'm really not sure. Now, are you hungry? I can call for some food."

Kurt shook his head, then answered "Hospital food is gross. Maybe… We have some time. Do you think that we could go out and grab something?"

"Well, you can't leave until later. But if you don't mind being alone, I can get something if you want."

"That sounds fine Dad. Thanks."

"You sure you'll be okay alone?" Kurt nodded. "Okay then. Just forewarning though, I was instructed that you could only eat bland foods for now. But I'll try to sneak you some orange juice or something."

"Thanks Dad. I really appreciate it."

Burt then walked out of the room, and Kurt took a deep breath. He didn't really like being alone in the hospital before, but now that he couldn't see he didn't mind it as much.

Oh yeah. Kurt was blind.

He sighed and tried to push back the tears that came with remembering. He would never see anything again, except for the blaring light of the sun through the window. Speaking of which, the light was kind of hurting his head. He would have to remember to tell his dad that later. Too bad he couldn't text him and let him know.

Now that Kurt was thinking about it, there was so much that he couldn't do now, either at all or without assistance. How was he supposed to carry his life on as normal, if he couldn't do the simplest things without help.

_**TBC.**_


End file.
